Post 1 #My Delusional Love Life

This how I sometimes lie to myself when it comes to relationships. It’s funny how the tables ALWAYS turn. This is my story:

Being delusion is seeing something that’s not there (duhhh) but when it comes to relationships there are probably a million ways to see (want to see) things that are simply not there. We lie to ourselves thinking that the other person will change for us. We lie to ourselves thinking the relationship will get better when it really won’t and we even lie to ourselves since the beginning, when we start falling. Here is my story:

From a guy’s perspective (okay, I know there’s a whole gender revolution going on but for the sake of this post let’s keep it simple for now), the whole process of getting to know someone is nothing new to us. We see someone we like, we identify some sort of evidence that we’ll get along and we go for it. Perhaps I’m generalizing? Each in our own style, right? Anyway, if you’re someone like me, someone that loves seeing signs as evidence that something is “meant to be” it’s really easy to get yourself caught up in a rut where things just simply aren’t what they seem (I swear I was seeing things). And it can get real fucked up if you can’t manage to find yourself again. At some point, you are going to have to face up to the truth.

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About the Author

Quick! If you just need my PERSONAL DETAILS, SCROLL DOWN. You’ll find all of it displayed in BIIIG ASS LETTERS just for you. Otherwise, enjoy the read.

Hi there! My name is Joubert (or “Joe” for simplicity sake). So, who am I? Well, I am what you make of me really. A common place to start is probably with my qualifications. I have a BA degree in Graphic Design, Multimedia and Illustration along with other bullshit subjects’ I was forced to study (even though the shit I learnt there proved quite useful later on, oh well).

Originally, I’m from South-Africa but now a days you’ll find me grinding it out in Bangkok, Thailand. So, what am I about? Well, some people are good with jet skiing, banking or foofy sliding. I, my friends, am really good at looking at the bigger picture and I mean the BIIIG picture. Blah blah blah!

You’ve probably heard this before but what you might not have heard is that when I say BIIIG picture I mean I look at the picture from a far and then also the chair standing next to it, the relationship they have with each other and then too the relationship they have with the rug, with the window, on and on until I find the relationship it has with me. My place in. Am I even really there?

(Perhaps you can relate? Perhaps this is going too deep too early? Oh well, fuck it! This is about me and I’m deuuup! I wasn’t always like this though, well, maybe I was. Anyway…)

 

It all started with a series of events in the earlier parts of my life. You see, I use to be a faithful Christian boy and I mean FAITHFUL yawl! Hallelujah! Praise God! Until an event changed everything. Some might call it a spiritual awakening I just like to call it “Holy shit! What the fucks happening?” (Sorry Mom). But still, you don’t have a lot of kids now a day growing up with their dad telling them shit like:

“Listen son, you don’t have to go to church anymore, God is no longer there.”

(WAIT! WHAT? So, you are telling me all those boring hours in church was for NOTHING? Not even a degree in self-manipulation? You sneaky bastards haha! Just kidding. I was like FUCK YEAH! Anyway, no pun intended.)

Where were we? Oh yes! The most important part. Where it got really deep and painful was when my dad told us, and EVERY living human he came into contact with if I may add (I fucking HATED school because of this) the world was going to end 5 years from now. Let me say it again. My dad told me and even taught me why he thinks the world is going to end on 2011. Yes, as in time will stop. Apocalyptic shit man. It’s because of this that I snapped out of my previous mindset at a VERY early age. 15.

(Needless to say is I went from dad disproving the faith I was raised in till wanting me to believe something fucking CRAZY! I needed answers. This shit wasn’t going to fly.)

(So yeah, there was more than a few billboards all across Southern Africa spreading “The Truth”. This one just so happen to get a snap shot of a lekke bakkie passing it. You godda love bakkies! Oh, and yes, that’s my home address.)

So, now that I’m done talking about myself let’s move on to another interesting story, yours. Oh yeah by the way, if you know someone with a similar story or if you have a crazy story of your own please do share it with me and if you would be so kind as to e-mail it to me I’d be more than interested to read it. Why email? Well… I’ll only take it serious then since there are a LOT of idiots online plus if it’s truly important to you it’s important to me.

Oh, and of course I want your email address but to prove to you that I’m only going to use your address in a respectful manner, I’ve decide to not type it out on this page. If it’s truly important to you’ll know where to find it.

With your permission, I’m planning to make a post specially about your story, about everyone’s story. I feel the world needs to hear it.

Thank you for reading.

JOUBERT

PERSONAL DETAILS:

NAME & SURNAME:

JOUBERT COETZEE

CURRENT LOCATION (if not traveling):

BANGKOK, THAILAND

QUALIFICATIONS:

BA DEGREE IN GRAPHIC DESIGN, MULTI-MEDIA & ILLUSTRATION 

OTHER SUBJECTS:

ART HISTORY (degree), ANTHROPOLOGY (2 years), COMMUNICATION (2 years), LIFE SCIENCES (1 year), TRENDS (1 year)

LANGUAGES:

  • AFRIKAANS (similar to dutch) (1st 100%)
  • ENGLISH (2nd 100%)
  • THAI (30%)
  • VIETNAMESE (5 words)

DATE OF BIRTH:

10 MARCH 1990

PASSIONS:

  • EVERYTHING SPIRITUAL
  • EVERYTHING SCIENTIFIC
  • FUCKING EVERYTHING 
  • (accept pig squeal metal)